English Lessons.......
By J R Booker - A Chesterfield Lad and Spireite Supporter, Especially For Us
Signora! Signora!! Coom kweek! Shoofinella! Zat man over zere’ He complain about a di paella!
“Go back and tell him, There’s nowt wrong wi’ it, and, Manuel!! It’s not shoofinella--- It’s chuffin’ ‘ell!!
I’ve telled thee that many times, Till am blue in face! After all these years, thi’ English It’s a piggin’ disgrace!
Tha mecks that many mistakes, Enough is enough! Sit thissen darn and I’ll teach thee’ About the word “chuff”.
A chuff is a bird, Summat like a crow. But this is information , As tha dunt need to know.
LEARN THIS!! I’m chuffed -------------------- I’m happy I’m well chuffed--------------- even happier I’m dead chuffed---------------couldn’t be happier Chuff off------------------------- go away - quickly Don’t give a chuff-------------- don’t care That’s a chuff-------------------- surprisingly bad Chuff me ------------------------- surprisingly good You’re a chuff ------------------- an insult Chuffin’ cum ‘ere ,lad--------- a sexual invitation Well, I’ll be chuffed! ----------- the subject of the sexual invitation is a puff! Chuffin’ bog off then! --------- as before, not a sexual invitation He’s a nice chuff! --------------- he’s not nice Chuffin’ ‘ell --------------------- summats not quite right Chuffin’ Chesterfield ---------- they always beat Rotherham at football
So here is a sentence to help thee understand!
Chuffin’ Chesterfields chuffin’ beat us a “chuffin’” gen!. I’m not well chuffed! They’re nice chuffs, they are! I wish they’d chuff off back to Derbyshire. Chuff me! We’ve still got to chuffin’ play ‘em at their chuffin’ ground ? Chuffin’ ‘ell!!
So, nar as tha knows how to use it, Tell that bloke who’s paellas a bit tough, To shurrup and gerrit etten,--------------- Cos tha dunt gi’ a chuff!!
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